Friday, May 15, 2009

Shaved Pussy

Every couple of months or so we try to do a post or series of posts which will hopefully work to optimize our search engine visitation activity. The technical term for this is SEO. I can't really afford to pay a professional to optimize my blog visits from search engines, so I just struggle along on my own as best I can. I DO know what the most popular search terms are for Google and Yahoo and MCN. (These popular terms have nothing to do with explaining electricity or the U.S. Constitution.) So, generally, in order to get a bump in my traffic to the blog, I will occasionally make a post that purposely includes these popular search words and terms. The most recent post I made was well-received and DID get me a fair pop on my stats. I'm hoping this post will do just as well.

Please bear with me on this. We may get some new and interesting readers to banter back and forth with.

Thank you.

PS - I think this is different than PageRank. The people who visit don't generally link to me but only leave obscene angry comments. But every little bit helps.

Fanny shaves her beaver.
Dick admires his neighbor's bush.
Dick gets his cock out.
Fanny has a sore pussy.
Dick has a tug.
Dick spanks the monkey.
Fanny loves semen.

15 comments:

A. said...

Actually it seems much longer than a couple of months.

This so much reminds me of the alternative version of Captain Pugwash. It featured Master Bates, Roger the Cabin Boy and Seaman Staines.

Good luck! :) I tried it with a football post - it didn't work an iota - but perhaps people aren't interested in primary school football. I still get most hits for an obscure French ch√Ęteau.

Lidian said...

Max, what sort of new visitors are you hoping to get?

Canucklehead said...

I'm with Lidian - its not the QUANTITY of vistors, but the QUALITY. Looks like you're on the right track!

BTW - next podcast is in production. TOPIC: dispelling (or confirming) Canadian stereotypes?

Interested? You know where to find me. CHEERS!

Lady Sarcasm said...

This will get the all the wrong traffic.. lol

Sheila said...

All, of course, in the best possible taste. Or do you have to live in the UK to understand that?

ettarose said...

So that is what you are supposed to do to get traffic! All this time a bunch of hosers have been telling me if I write well they will come. Pish!

Angelika said...

Let me know how this scheme to get more traffic works out.

That pussy looks weird shaved like that...

Relax Max said...

@A. - You didn't use the word football enough. Plus the Americans probably thought you meant real football. :)

French Chateaus it is!

Seaman Staines???? Hmmmm.

Relax Max said...

@Lidian - True. I didn't really think this through, did I? Was only concerned with popular key words. Oh, well. This blog could use another pervert or two. :)

Relax Max said...

@Canucklehead - On the right track? Well, I thought so. But A. and Lidian are confusing me. :)

I really have never heard of Canadian stereotypes. I just picture the average Canadian as trudging though the snow with a keg of beer on his back, on the lookout for a hockey game, eh?

Give me an example of a stereotype, eh?

I know, I know. A loser who can't satisfy a woman so he turns to llamas, eh?

But enough seriousness. Let's tell some jokes to take our minds off you beer-swilling hockey pucks of the Great White North.

Eh?

I'm still interested, man. I just can't buy time right now. If it weren't for this super-popular blog and letting all my fans down, I would sell my computer for food.

Take care. We will get together. I signed up for the Turnip ad thing so I could be in your scavenger hunt. Just the comments, not the ads. I have had my fill of adverts on my blog ever since entrecard made me sick. Maybe later.

Relax Max said...

@Lady S - I guess I am finally figuring it out. Sort of like using George Bush as a key search phrase, huh. How's it going?

Relax Max said...

@Sheila - What??

@Ettarose - Well, they may be right. With you we will never know. :)

@Angelika - Why does it sound so dirty when you say it? God, what have I done??

Angelika said...

LMFAO!

Because you have a dirty mind. You didn't actually hear me say "shaved pussy".

:-)

A. said...

Because you have a dirty mind.That's a surprise to you? :) :)

Relax Max said...

@Angelika - I don't have a dirty mind. Tell me what you think I meant. :)

@A. - I can't believe you said that. :)

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