Waterboarding is highly misunderstood

Waterboarding is getting a bad rap. Waterboarding needs to be "re-imaged" as the advertising world puts it.

See... in truth, waterboarding helps reverse global warming. There is entirely too much CO2 being emitted by the prisoners at Guantanamo. Who could argue with that? By injecting water, which is really high in oxygen content, up the noses of the offending emitters, the greenhouse emissions go down.

This is not just another wild claim by this blogger. It is a scientific fact.*

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Please note that the picture above is only an artist's rendering and you should NOT attempt to waterboard any terrorist in the manner shown in the illustration. For example, it is highly recommended that you tie the terrorist down and also lose the necktie. Otherwise, just as sure as Michelle Obama and Sarah Palin were both born in 1964, the terrorist is going to reach out and squeeze your cojones until water runs out of your own eyes. This will make it EXTREMELY hard for you to concentrate on the task at hand - and concentration is key during waterboarding. Alternatively, the terrorist may use your necktie as a lever to bounce your forehead off the wooden platform repeatedly. This is also not recommended when concentration is important.

*Not to be construed as an actual scientific fact.**

**But the process was actually investigated and confirmed by Nobel Prize-winning researcher, Dr. Moumad al-Gore.***

***Not to be construed as an actual truthful statement.

Doc

Doc Holliday (1851-1887).

Gambler. Gunfighter. Dentist. Friend of Wyatt Earp and participant in the Gunfight at the OK Corral in Tombstone, Arizona. Extremely well educated in the classics, mathematics, Latin, French, Greek. Doctor of Dental Surgery from Pennsylvania College of Dental Surgery. Participant in the Earp Vendetta. An extremely dedicated gambler. Died in Colorado of Tuberculosis.

Oh, those darned politicians!

Bush haters were pretty uncompromising about calling the former president a liar. Every little misjudgment or miscalculation or any act based on the advice of others was quickly called a Bush lie.

Because they cut Bush no slack or ever gave him the benefit of the doubt, I'm sure they won't mind if Obama is treated with the same respect they showed Bush.

Obama is a liar.

It would be hard to count the times when he stated in campaign speeches: "On my first day in office, I will call in the Joint Chiefs of Staff and order a close to the Iraq war."

Many people voted for Obama on that premise. Maybe enough to get him elected.

Today was his first day in office. He didn't call in the Joint Chiefs of Staff and order an end to the Iraq War.

Therefore, using the the same standard as the Bush haters use, Obama is a liar.

The first thing on the list will insure failure all by itself. So if you feel you cannot stick to a full and balanced program, at least practice number one.

1. Learn the habit of putting things off until tomorrow.

2. Learn the blame game. It’s not fair. It’s not your fault. You’re not responsible.

3. Be selfish. Take what you can get. The plight of others is not your concern.

4. Seek constant pleasure and instant gratification. Do not defer pleasure or rewards. Do not endure temporary hardship and unpleasantness. Look for shortcuts.

5. Be entitlement-minded: they owe it to you. You’ve got it coming.

6. Give up easily. Accept your lot in life. It wasn’t meant to be.

7. Don’t take risks. Never put yourself on the line. Protect what you’ve got. Build a protective bunker. They’re out to get you.

8. Never risk emotional pain, heartache, or the possibility of disappointment. Never expose your true feelings.

9. Do not set goals. You will only be disappointed when you don’t reach them. Be flexible and ready to change course at the first difficulty.

10. Understand that formal education is a waste of time. Learn to live by your wits and natural inclinations.

Is there a solution to Gaza?

According to an Associated Press article on January 11, 2009:

Israel launched its campaign in Gaza on Dec. 27 to stop rocket fire from the militant Palestinian group Hamas. Gaza health officials say nearly 870 Palestinians have been killed, roughly half of them civilians. Thirteen Israelis have also died.

The following are some points of view that have since been expressed in the media:

1. Israel should not have responded to the rocket attacks with force

2. Israel has a right to defend itself, but should have only used equal force

3. Israel should have tried to talk longer while continuing to endure the rocket attacks

4. Israel is an illegitimate state and should not be allowed to exist

5. Palestine is for Palestinians. The conflict will continue until Israel is driven out

6. Israel has the right to defend itself and to take whatever measures are necessary to remove the cause of the assault on its territory

Do any of these views match your own?

Also comment, if you wish, on how you feel this decades old struggle might be resolved.

If at all possible, please do your best to stick to the historical facts whenever you can, if you know them, but give your personal views and beliefs, even if you are not sure about the history of the conflict.